Definition of a Stay At Home Mom

I'm sure there are plenty of you out there who know what the real, true definition of a stay at home mom is, but sadly there are many who think it's all about staying home and playing with your child. Oh, how I wish.

Let me preface this with the reason I am giving the definition. And not Webster's definition. Webster is an idiot....and obviously a man who never stayed home w/ his children. I'm giving you MY definition. But, alas...I digress. The reason: I came home from an event, kind of excited. Not peeing in my pants excited, but more like I had a nice night, found something that interested me excited. Now, let me say....I do not expect this gift. Cost way to much money. It was just nice to think 'wow.....someday, I could own this'....keyword:: SOMEDAY. Not today, not tomorrow, not next year...someday. I was told, upon explaining what I had found, that I need to 'get a job' first! WOW...thanks for sending a missile through my balloon. Asshat. Hmmm, a job. Mmmkay....While I know that my 'job' doesn't pay the bills, and he works as much as he can, and I appreciate it like he could never imagine....my JOB is running this house. My job is caring for our son.

So, before I go on another rampage, let me give you my definition of a Stay At Home Mom:

A SAHM is the finder of lost paci's, blankets, and socks. (Sometimes, I swear the sock monster eats the paci's.) A SAHM gets up before everyone, usually no later than 6am, every single day (that's 7 days a week, incase you were wondering) just so she can get that much needed jolt of caffeine running through her veins before the house wakes up. (ignoring the cats plea for food...they'll survive another hour). She makes breakfast, cleans the dishes, and cleans up the breakfast mess of scrambled eggs all over the floor. She does laundry, puts it away, makes the bed, picks up clothes that have been through on the floor. She cleans the bathroom that you mess up as soon as you come home. She soothes a crying baby, plays with him, loves him and teaches him things that you don't get a chance to. *you really think I wanted my son to say 'daddy' first? NO.....mommy would have been nice....oh well.

A SAHM brings the baby all over the place in order to socialize him with the world. I'm not just galavanting around.....he's learning in the process. She scours the newspapers for coupons, and food shops late at night so as to get the better deals and without people....the silence is great! She makes dinner for you, feeds the baby his dinner (although you do help, on occasion), cleans up the dinner mess, from both of you, then finally gets to eat her dinner.

She does your laundry, vacuums your house, dusts, polishes, scrubs things down. She feeds the cats, cleans their litter box, reorganizes things, she does every single thing that you do not do. Then when 9/10pm rolls around, she goes to bed just to start everything all over again at 6am.

So, the next time someone hears that you're a SAHM and says "get a job" show them this. Then tell them that they can do all of that for 1 week. Betcha they'll never say that again....